Brian Doherty

The Pitch:

How My Passion for Rock ‘N’ Roll Led Me to RCA Records and a Career in Teaching.

Part 1

Something’s Gotta Give

I was at a pivotal point in my life.  On one hand I could make improvements and climb up the ladder.  On the other, I could fall off the steep ledge into ruin.  There was no in-between.  I was sitting alone in the Manhattan office of RCA Records President, Bob Jamieson.  On the wall hung photos of him holding prize catches on fishing trips, on family vacations, and at a podium accepting an award.  Another wall was devoted to gold records and autographed pictures of well known entertainers.  I wiped the sweat from my upper lip and rehearsed my pitch internally once again.  The devil on my right shoulder whispered, “What are you doing here?” The angel on my left cheered, “You deserve this meeting.  DO NOT fall apart now!” There was activity outside the door.  In walked a 50-something-year-old man resembling a robust William Buckley.  He had a look that suggested weekends were well spent in the Hamptons or on the yacht.

Two months earlier I had the realization that my career was down the toilet.  Although it had been declining, I had refused to acknowledge it and was in denial.  I wasn’t getting any gigs, and my stack of bills was no longer manageable.  Few things are worse for a self-employed musician than to have the sign of desperation stamped on his forehead.  I spent weeks working the phone, checking in with my contacts and associates.  There were a few close calls that didn’t pan out, including an audition to replace Bill Berry in R.E.M.  I pleaded for help from my network, but nothing came my way.  “Hey, weren’t you the drummer for They Must Be Giants?” a few people would ask. “What happened, Dude?” The truth was that I was slowly going broke playing with They Might Be Giants (the subject of another story).  The bell tolled.  It was time to wake up.

I went to the library for answers and read career, self help and business books.  In many books, a recurring piece of advice was that one should brainstorm ways to help and improve a certain business.  If you could help individuals in that business overcome their problems and hurdles, you’d be valuable to that industry.  This made sense to me.  Besides, what else did I have to go on?  “Who could I help, and how could I help them?” I took these questions seriously and embraced the advice I received.  “Something’s gotta give, man!” I thought in desparation.  Soon, I came up with a plan of action and drafted a letter.

Part 2

The President Will See You Now

The only thing I’ve ever been passionate about, or considered myself a real expert in, was music.  I spent years ingesting every Rock ‘N’ Roll lyric, drum beat, arrangement, orchestration and production technique I could get my hands on.  Later I studied music more formally spending seven years at a music conservatory called The Manhattan School of Music; two years of high school, four of undergraduate and one of graduate.  Afterward, I continued my schooling at The NYC School of Hard Knocks, The Institute of Kick Your Ass and The University of Had Enough Yet? In general, I was an excellent student.  I worked hard, laid ground work and patiently waited for the faucet to flow freely.  Mostly, it trickled.

The phone rang.  “Hello.  Is this Brian?  Hi, this is Claudette from The Bertlesman Music Group (BMG).  We received your proposal letter, and we are eager to talk about it with you.” Jesus!  BMG was a multi-national music corporation that included RCA, Jive and Zomba records, as well as a myriad of music publishing companies and related industries.  Indeed, it owned the entire catalogue of Elvis recordings.  She continued, “Unfortunately Klaus, our CEO won’t be in New York next week, so he asked if you could meet with the President of RCA Records, Bob Jamieson instead.  Is that OK?” Was that OK? I just hit the jackpot!  Finally, my ideas would be validated by someone of importance in the music industry.  “Klaus wants you to know that he’s excited about your proposal and hopes that you could bring Bob up to speed, so that we could move forward together.”

Those days I played the role of a slacker-musician, wearing shorts most of the year and driving my old truck around Woodstock.  In my business as a freelance musician, I was missing the mark and wasn’t evolving much.  I was often too eager and my immaturity was pervasive.  Always prepared with a crude joke or a toxic fart, I once sent producer Neil Dorfsman into a fit of rage after releasing my “music” in the control room of The Hit Factory.  Ironically, however, I did some of my best work during this period, playing on dozens of recordings, writing songs and producing other artists.  In many ways, transitioning to a position at a record company made sense to me.  After all, I had real-world experience in the music business. Perhaps, it was time to evolve a bit and take it to the next level.

I documented my best business ideas in a detailed letter that I drafted to all of the major record labels.  RCA was the first to respond.  On the day of my RCA meeting, I arrived early and killed time by walking around the block a few times.  On my final loop, some sisters sitting on a bench shouted my way, “Oh shoot, there’s Pauly Shore!  No, he look like Kenny G!!!” It was time to go.  I headed for the corporate offices of BMG Music at 1540 Broadway, my heart racing as I signed in with security.

Part 3

Return To Rock!

One day I’m going to write a business book.  It will be a best seller for the simple reason that I know absolutely nothing about the subject. In addition, I’ve made every mistake imaginable regarding my own business affairs.  I’ve had hair-brained schemes about owning a record label, a production and publishing company, music schools, or about publishing an industry sourcebook.  The fact was, that as a musician-for-hire, it was enough of a struggle simply staying in business, let alone making attempts to dominate related fields. That’s why I think my book would be a best seller.  I’d discuss my various business blunders, and then have real experts explain to the reader what I should have done instead.

While we’re at it, allow me share some of my other music biz “revelations” that have gotten me nowhere:

If you have a catchy Holiday song, you’ll be set for life. For instance, who’s every heard of the band The Waitresses, except for when their song Christmas Wrapping hammers you every season? Money in the bank, year after year.

If you can’t sing, have someone else record your songs. You’ll make a mint in publishing.  Just look at Paul Williams, Jimmy Webb and Chip Taylor (Wild Thing and Angel of The Morning).

If you can’t write your own songs, record something that’s in the public domain. “I’ve Been Working On The Railroad” and certain children’s melodies are not owned by any writer, which means you do not have to share your profits.

Part 4

But I digress…

Back to the story of my pitch to RCA circa 1998.  Generally, my idea was to help major record companies earn greater profits over the long term.  At the time, for example, it may have been true that money was made on an INXS or Counting Crows recording.  However, I would assume that more money per year was generated by sales of Hotel California by The Eagles, or Back In Black by AC/DC.  It seemed that RCA was only interested in short-term profits, by bands that everyone has since forgotten.  To put it another way, let’s assume that Pink Floyd’s The Dark Side of The Moon sells an average of 400,000 units per year.  Let’s also assume that it’s been in circulation for about 37 years.  So, 400,000 units X 37 years = 14,800,000 units.  I’d say that my estimate is conservative and that it’s likely to be much more.  The research I conducted showed that this album was on the Billboard charts for 1,500 weeks and still sells about 9,000 units a week to this day. In addition, I doubt that, outside of the first year, there was much advertising or promotion costs associated with these figures, so it continues to be a direct pipeline to pure profit.  If this is true, why would a record label spend money and resources on a band that would sell only a fraction of these figures?  It seems that they would want to invest in producing music that would become the staple of the future.  This brings me to the second tenant of my pitch…

In the late ’90s I learned that the reunion tour of The Grand Funk Railroad was one of the largest money making tours of all time.  This made sense to me.  In the 90’s, record labels were soley focused on a younger market.  Bands like Nirvana and other grunge acts consumed the business, while MTV entirely stopped showing music videos in favor of bikini contests.  But, while this was happening, where was the new product for the legions of Bob Seger, AC/DC, Rush, Allman Brothers Band or ZZ Top fans?  There were millions of music fans who had no choice for any new bands and instead could only buy remastered editions, for example, of an old Def Leopard album.  Do you get what I mean?  Where did these fans go and what did they spend there money on? In my opinion, many of them turned to Country music; a genre that welcomed them and their wallets with open arms.  Country music has since become the new “staple” and in my opinion has filled the Classic Rock void.  Wisely, Country music dialed in a bit more Rock ‘N’ Roll to oblige.  Smart move!

Part 5

Silly Me

With the above in mind, here’s my theory and the essential points of my pitch:

• Record labels invest in genuinely creative acts (like Pink Floyd and The Doors) who produce quality products, which then generate billions of dollars. This type of music becomes the industry standard for the Rock genre as well as for generations of Rock fans.

• The aforementioned “standards” so easily generates money year-after-year, that the music industry has the ability to focus on developing new artists.  However, it rarely operates outside the proven revenue generators of the past.

• In the 80’s, industry returns skyrocket when formats change from LP to CD.  The lesson to the executives?  “The more I sit back and relax, the more money I make!”

• Next, major labels get fat and lazy, like well-fed pigeons in a park. They forget their core A & R values and focus only on the easy, short-term money.  In part, they accomplish this by spending money on marketing and advertising (Remember Vanilla Ice, Millie Vanilli and CMC Music Factory?)  It was easier for the business to pedal the junk they already had and jam it down the throat of the consumer.  Creatively speaking, they were only interested in music that was cheaply produced.

• In the meantime, the industry ignores bands like Dave Matthews and Phish. These bands generate millions of dollars for live performances–money that bypasses the record company and goes directly into pockets of the artists.

• This “game change” of marketing music “product” and producing cheap music may work for a while, but it will never exceed the sales of music based on the talent and cultivation of musicians and songwriters like Dylan, Elvis, Beatles, U2, Eagles, AC/DC, and other standard artists.

• This new process also stiff-arms the 30 and over audience, who’ve since found comfort in the “new” country music.

Hey, but I’m the guy with no business background.  Silly me.

Part 6

Meat and Potatoes

The pitch I delivered seemed simple enough.  Here were my notes:

• Return to classic A & R practices by scouting and cultivating gifted artists and bands in the classic Rock ‘N Roll genre.  In other words, follow the same process that yielded The Dead, Lynard Skynard, Cream, Buffalo Springfield, YES and the like.
• This cohort would carry on the “new” standards of Rock music.
• Work to develop their music over a long period of time (think of the many albums Bonnie Raitt produced before having success).  In other words, stick with the artist and allow room for some failure.
• My proposed musical model would be Classic Rock of the 70’s and 80’s.  My expectations would be that songs by these newer bands would satisfy the older, say, AC/DC fan, and would be Classic Rock radio friendly. In fact, these stations could play these new songs today among the many other classics on currently on their playlist.

(The only band that I can think of that even came close to achieving what I describe was The Black Crows.  It was brilliant when they collaborated with Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin.  I believe it appealed to the disenfranchised listeners that I discussed earlier, converting them into Black Crows fans forever. All they did was tap into the Classic Rock pipeline.)

• Finally, according to the design of the pitch, I would be the one to clarify the business model and implement it for the record company.

To Prove a Point

It seems like radio formats go through cycles rather quickly.  The Smooth Jazz station turns to Alternative Rock seemingly overnight.  The Lite FM station to 24 Hour Sports, and so on.  The only genre that’s consistent is Classic Rock.  For example, try the following on your next road trip: As you flip through the stations notice the variety in every radio market.  Now, find the classic rock station in each market.  I guarantee that it’ll be prominent on the dial and easy to tune in.  To me, this means that there are plenty of people listening and that there is a great demand.  You’ll rarely hear a new song from a new band.  You may also notice that these classic rock stations play the same stuff, over and over.  In terms of my pitch, this meant that the business had abandoned a large market.  Like a grocery store selling the same line of food year after year, because the people used to like it.  Instead, why not, give them something “new and improved” and still sell the classics?  Perhaps the new line of product will even become the staple of the future!

Part 7

Don’t Let The Door…

In preparation for my impending meeting, I asked RCA to send me information and recent releases. Soon, a package arrived containing recordings of newly-signed bands, lists of current tours, and a breakdown of on-going projects.  I studied and listened.  Those days, RCA was rudderless and seemingly, had no interest in Rock ‘N’ Roll.  I had been in an RCA band years earlier and personally felt that the company was asleep at the wheel.  The cds in the package were disappointing.  Overall, it appeared that the label was too busy following trends instead of creating them.

On the day of my meeting, I received a warm welcome from the RCA staff.  A listening session had just adjourned, and the A & R staff were mulling about.  There were Suits lingering outside the conference room in a heated discussion.  Bob Jamieson came over and introduced himself and asked me to wait a few minutes more.  About an hour later, I was escorted into his office and was left to myself for a bit.  This was when I studied the photos and memorabilia to get a sense of the man to whom I’d submit my business proposal.  Eventually, he returned and we sat down to talk.

I began with my theory of a “New” Rock ‘N’ Roll, satisfying a disenfranchised and older market.  I spared no detail and spoke from the heart as if we were at a Happy Hour on our third round.  As my pitch progressed, Bob became distracted by phone calls, impromptu meetings and paperwork.  He also went out and spoke to his secretary for several minutes.  When he came back, he had a copy of the original letter I had sent them, and was skimming through it.  It was obvious that he hadn’t read it.  It also became apparent that he had no idea who I was and why I so desperately wanted to meet with him.  In addition, I didn’t get the sense that this guy knew much about music.  I’d refer to bands or songs to demonstrate a point and was waiting for the “Yeah!  I know what you mean!” type of response.  Instead, Bob grew restless and fidgety.  At the end of ten minutes or so, he made a polite excuse and called our meeting to an end.  He looked like a man who had been tortured by mindless talk about music–by a musician no less.  The horror!

…Hit You On The Way Out!

As he escorted me out of his office, I could see the red face of his secretary, Claudette, as I walked by her desk.  She diverted her eyes when I thanked her for inviting me.  The look on her face told me that she got a royal reaming from her boss for setting up this meeting.  She was in deep shit.  I felt like Jerry Maguire in the movie, the morning after the delivery of his infamous Mission Statement.  Embarrassed for misdirected passions and humiliated for my naivete.  I was treading water in another world and realizing that I had no idea how it operated.  “You know, you’d be a great A & R guy” he said as I waited for the elevator.  “It’s just that we’re not hiring anyone at the moment.” “Gee,” I thought, “thanks for offering me the hypothetical job.”  I walked in wanting to reinstate Rock ‘N’ Roll to its rightful throne.  I walked out in search of my dignity.

Part 8

The After Story

Bob Jamieson contacted me some time later and asked me to meet with one of his A & R guys.  Maybe he had a chance to reflect on our meeting and my ideas.  I took the meeting.  I forget the guy’s name, but I remember that every few minutes, he’d supress a yawn.  After that, there were no more discussions or meetings with RCA.

In hindsight, I think things could have gone either way for me.  Going out on a limb for my “pitch” was well worth it, and I’ve done it again since.  From an early age, I believed that you had to be the best at what you do.  That’s what really matters.  This is a noble mission, but there’s a lot left out of that statement.  There’s your roomate at Yale or NYU, the personal connections with your neighbors in Great Neck or Scarsdale, the charity your family supports, your handicap on the golf course, the size of your trust fund, your fraternity brothers, your dad’s Wall Street associates, your wife the banker, or the Board that your mother chairs.  I’ve never had any of these “assets.”  Instead, after my RCA meeting, I could feel the loafer heel on my forehead as I was repelled from the party boat.

A Valuable Lesson

The lesson I learned was this: Assess, acknowledge, move on.  Sometimes things work out, sometimes they don’t.  Sometimes you’re handed your station in life on a platter, and other times, no matter how hard you try, you’ll never achieve your dreams and goals.  If that’s the case, don’t make a big deal about it, just move on to the next endeavour.  However, it is important that you continue to assert yourself.  Do the hard work and don’t worry too much about the outcome.  Two years later, in a strange twist, I became an elementary teacher in the NYC Public School system.  In a way, I felt like I had answered a calling.  Teaching and I fit like hand in glove.  In another way, because of my teaching job, my music career was never better.  Finally, I was able to say “no” to sub-standard or underpaying gigs.  In addition, my schedule was suddenly full, which made my time more valuable to me and my clients.  Surprisingly, leaving my old lifestyle was as easy as dropping a hot coal.  Assess, acknowledge, move on.

The Pitch

I’m finishing up my latest post entitled, The Pitch: How My Passion for Rock ‘N’ Roll Led Me to RCA Records and a Career In Teaching. In it, I detail my many hair-brained business concepts, including one that caught the attention of music giant, BMG and the President of RCA Records, Bob Jamieson. It’s an eight-part series and will be posted daily over the course of eight days beginning Sunday, June 13, 2010. An earlier posting, The Pitch: Part I serves as the basis of the series and will be included in an updated and revised form.  UDATE: JUNE 30, 2010.  The Pitch: How My Passion for Rock ‘N’ Roll Led Me to RCA Records and a Career In Teaching can be read here.

Drums and Percussion At Work

My long-time friend, percussionist Emedin Rivera and I recently performed with Bock and Blu in Stamford, CT (see photo below). Emedin and I have been working together with various artists since the mid-80’s. For years we were the rhythm section for legendary violinist, Noel Pointer. Recently, we had a chance to reminisce about our tenure with Noel and how, at sound check, we would often learn that we’d be playing with all the other acts on the night’s bill. In other words, we were “farmed-out” to the other entertainers. Showbiz!  Gotta love it! Emedin and I are proud Paiste and Vic Firth endorsers, hence the products in the pics.

Video Plans

Plans are in the works to shoot a series of short drum videos for my Youtube channel and my website. Among other ideas, I want to create segments that demonstrate ensemble playing and the process of making musical decisions. My goal is to make them short, easy and informative.

So far, I’ve posted two drum loops to my website. They are free and easily downloadable. You can find them under the Audio Tracks category to the right or here.  I posted one track on Youtube recently. You can view it here.

• I recently recorded a drum track for producer Michael Patzig and singer Kristy Kay for her new single, American Princess.

• After searching for a good Rock ‘n Roll read, I ripped through Jerry Weintraub’s book When I Stop Talking, You’ll Know I’m Dead. Here’s a guy with some real showbiz/music credibility. Great stories of Sinatra, Elvis and insights about what makes great artists. Other good music industry books I’ve read in the past were Mansion on the Hill, Hit Men, The Dirt and The Love You Make. Neil Young’s biography, Shakey came highly recommended but I couldn’t get through it. I was surprised because I was really looking forward to digging in.  However, it didn’t hold my interest and I felt it was a little too long.  Maybe I’ll see it differently at another point of my life.

• I’m finishing up the story of my tenure with Freedy Johnston and the making of Can You Fly. I’m having a little trouble portraying some of the subtleties and nuances of that period. I also need to decide what personal stuff to leave in or cut out. In the meantime, if you’re not familiar with this period of Freedy’s music, here are some listener reviews of Can You Fly. My posting should be ready by Monday, May 24th.  UPDATE: The piece is posted and can be read here.

In my opinion The Silos of the late 80’s/early 90’s were a one  of a kind, real rock ‘n roll band. The band’s music lay somewhere between The Stones, The Outlaws and Gram Parsons.  I always felt that The Silos had unlimited potential and could have set the tone for a generation of guitar driven rock bands.  Those of us involved with the band knew it outright.  Although our RCA record got great reviews, (see link below) the way the Gainesville/RCA sessions unfolded was a complete disappointment.  The record was a dud.  (The best recording of the band to this day is a series of live recordings, captured on tour by our soundman Joe Chinnici.  They’re not commercially released, but if you ever get your hands on them, you’ll hear for yourself.)  This particular line up of The Silos remained intact until 1992 and was a powerhouse on tour.  I stayed on a little longer (something I’m unfortunately prone to do) than did JD Foster and Bob Rupe, recording more tracks which ended up on subsequent Silos records.  My last tour with the band was a grueling six week van tour of Germany, Austria, Spain and Switzerland.  The following is my story as the band’s drummer during this period, and of our only major label recording.

Richard Ford

In 1987, bass player Richard Ford had just finished working with Joe Jackson and was settling into the freelance music scene in New York. Richard had also played with Bill Nelson of Bee Bop Deluxe as well as many others.  Originally from England, Richard came to the US and lived near my home town of Randolph, NJ before settling in Hoboken. He recommended me for work regularly, for which I’ll be forever grateful.  He is a true musician and would be sorely missed by The Silos at the time of his departure from the band.

The Silos had just been voted Best Band in America by a Rolling Stone Magazine Critics Poll and were looking for a new rhythm section to carry them to major status, getting them signed to a major label record company.  Richard was asked to play bass and he recommended me for the drum chair.  The line up of The Silos was Bob Rupe and Walter Salas-Humara on guitars/vocals.  Me and Richard Ford on drums and bass.

Getting Signed

In addition to a new rhythm section, the band also had a new business manager; Hoboken realtor Mark Zoltak. Mark was a former NYC DJ and was the motivational muscle behind the band. He had great ideas and knew the songs better than those of us in the band.  He regularly spoke his mind and had strong opinions about music.  To Mark, music was either great or it sucked.  There was no in-between.  Mark truly understood the essence of The Silos.  He got it.  He devised a business plan to unleash the improved band and get it signed to a major label.  The band quickly became an unparalleled live act and played dozens of industry showcases in Los Angeles and in the Northeast.  The plan worked.  In March of 1989 the band was signed to RCA Records by the label’s president Bob Buziak.  The trick now would be to capture the true essence of the band at a studio recording.

A One Man Band

I was not involved in the daily business of the band, so I can’t explain the rationale behind most of the business decisions. As the September recording date approached it was obvious that there was a power struggle within the band.  Specifically, Walter was making it known to us that the band was his brain child.  (Subtext: “The record deal is all mine!!”)  Although Walter was indeed a strong songwriter, he was not even an adequate singer or guitar player.  It was Bob Rupe’s Otis Redding voice and Neil Young guitar style that fleshed out Walter’s contributions.  It was the way the ensemble executed the songs and the way we played together that made us a great band.  It was my hope that Bob would hold fast to his co-leader status, checking Walter’s power grab.  To my dismay however, Bob assumed the role of second-in-command.

To make things even worse, Walter then began hinting about playing the drums on the upcoming record. Yikes! Just what I needed, right?  One month before our scheduled sessions, he invited me over to his apartment for dinner.  After eating in awkward silence, he turned on the stereo and played tracks of great drummers like Al Jackson and Levon Helm.  Next he played some of our demos, the ones I drummed on.  Out of nowhere he then delivered this mandate: “Start playing like one of these drummers or I’ll find someone else to play drums in the band.” I thought, “What a douche bag!” Granted, those are two great drummers, but not really suitable for the guitar rock of The Silos.  Also, not the drummer he sought out and hired for greater success-ME!  Please don’t get me wrong.  Most of my job as a drummer has been to listen to others and execute their music as they hear it.  It’s also been my experience that when someone pulls shit like this there’s usually an ulterior motive.  This was his first of many moves to play drums on our recordings.  It was this need for control that would trump everything else.  Even if it meant he’d sabotage the band’s record deal and chances of success.

There was great irony in the fact that the guy who was the worst singer, guitarist, bassist, drummer and producer; in fact the worst musician in the band was the one who wanted to play every instrument and do everything himself. Walter had no interest in being a member of band, unless perhaps it was a one-man band.  His desire to play drums would weigh heavily on our upcoming Gainesville recording sessions and would eventually crush my desire to work with him altogether.  In the meantime, while on a coffee break from one of our many Hoboken demo sessions, Richard revealed to me that he’d be quitting and would not be joining us in Florida for the recording of the record.  For me, that was the beginning of the end.

We plowed ahead.  Austin-based JD Foster would replace Richard on bass. Cowboy Junkies producer Peter J. Moore was brought in from Toronto.  Ed Bair would run house/stage sound, and Peter Yianolis would be the recording engineer and operator of the mobile truck.  On September 25, 1989, the band and crew settled into rented apartments in the town of Gainesville, Florida ready to record.

Why Gainesville?

 During this period of The Silos, my real home was on Bergen Avenue in Jersey City. Richard, Walter and manager Mark Zoltak all lived in nearby Hoboken.  Bob lived on the lower east side of Manhattan.  We were all within a few miles of each other and within an easy commute to mid-town Manhattan, home to dozens of the world’s top recording studios.  In spite of this, Walter somehow convinced RCA executives that recording our record in NYC would be too distracting (from what?).  That instead, we’d need to record in Gainesville, Florida.  The fact that there were no suitable recording studios in Gainesville led us to an abandoned theater.  We used its stage and hallways for live sounds.  A mobile recording truck parked next to the building and was where the producer and engineer spent most of their time.  Admittedly, this made for an interesting story and good press.  For us however, that’s all we got out of it.  As we were rehearsing in the theater, we got word that RCA president and #1 Silos fan, Bob Buziak had been fired.

In the next Blog: The Sessions, Grasshopper and the Master, The Silos “School’s Out Tour”, Who’s on Bass? Good Press=Bad Sales, What New Songs?,  Bob’s Departure, Dumped by RCA, and Saved by “Can You Fly?”

 

Here’s one of the “great” reviews of The Silos record:

http://www.rollingstone.com/reviews/album/137649/review/5943972/thesilos

Rock ‘n Roll busses can be travelling frat hous­es. There’s little privacy, and they often smell like a combination of urine and diesel fumes. Remember that they stop almost exclusively at truck stops and not travelers rest areas (that gets old fast). The essential thing about bus touring is that it’s really your home away from home. Here’s how it works: the bus driver gets quality sleep in his hotel room while you’re hard at work sound checking, appearing at the local radio station, or actually playing the show. As the band blasts into the final chord of the gig, Mr. Bus Driver resurfaces from slumber land and heads for the bus where he waits for you and the rest of the band. You get on and wait for the crew to pack up everything — gear, lights, P. A., and monitors.

A couple of hours later, when this is finished and everyone has boarded the bus, it drives overnight to the city of the next engagement. It’s during this drive that you’re supposed to sleep. (I don’t know about you, but it’s hard for me to sleep well on a bus. I keep dreaming I’ll wake up to find the bus driver asleep in a bunk and no one at the wheel!).

When we reach the next city, the bus parks near the venue. Makes sense right? But here’s the juicy part: Let’s say that the bus arrives at that city, after dri­ving 350 miles, around 6AM. What do I do? Most of the time, I’ll continue sleep­ing for a couple of hours. If I wake up at 10am — now what? Breakfast? Shower? Phone calls? Visit rel­atives? Maybe. If the bus isn’t parked in the thriving center of town, none of this might be possible. It’s been my experience, in fact, that theaters and clubs are often on the outskirts of town and are sometimes in their most down­right funky neighborhoods.

I can shower in the club, provided they have one that I’d be comfortable using. I can dine at the McDonalds down the road a mile or so, provided I’m up for a brisk walk through heavy traffic. As a rule, the bus always stays at the gig. Phone calls can be made and my distant cousin is a mere $20 cab ride away.

Okay, let’s say that I’ve successfully negotiated my morning routine. It’s only noon, and sound check doesn’t begin until 5pm. Now what? As much as I try to be productive, this aspect of bus touring can be really limiting and cramp my style. The best solution is to have a hotel booked. This brings us to our next surprise.

NO TELL HOTEL…

Surprise #2 — Accommodations. DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT assume that you’ll be in a hotel every night. In fact, most bus tours only provide hotels on days off. Management reasons that if we’ll be getting to the club’s parking lot at 6am, it’ll just be easier for us to stay there, at the venue. ALL DAY.

Management will also reason that check-in time at the hotel isn’t until 1pm, and that we’d have to check out at 4pm to make 5pm sound check anyway, so why bother? If right now you’re asking why we have to check out of the hotel, just remember the overnight bus ride. In my experience, the band either checks out before sound check, or on the way out of town.

Management loves this because they save large sums of money (courtesy of your discomfort) on hotels during the duration of the tour. Please let me clarify one thing here: If you are on tour with a band in which you’re a full member, by all means, save money any way you can. I’m assuming here instead that you’re a hired sideman.

So, at this time, I might remind our friendly tour man­ager that many hotels offer an early check-in. And here’s where I see his shoulders hunch up, as he pre­tends like he’s learning about early check-in for the very first time! I watch him squirm. As long as it’s set up as such in advance, there should be a hotel room ready upon arrival.

The Perfect Bus Day

My friends, here’s how it should really work: The bus pulls up at the gig. The crew continues sleeping on in a drunken stupor, until their 10am equipment load-in. My band mates and I step off of the bus and into a cab that the tour manager has called. The cab takes us to a nearby hotel, where I check into my room.

I now have the day to rest, write postcards, make phone calls, practice and whatever else I may want. There is one hitch, however. Don’t assume you’ll get your own room. Many tours encourage doubling-up on rooms, obviously to save even more money. But why anyone would want to share a room with someone they’re already spending 18 hours a day with is beyond me.

You may be wondering why man­agement is so concerned with saving money. After all, this is Rock ‘n Roll, ain’t it? Well, to their credit, manage­ment has to run a tour like they would any other business. They have to look at the numbers to make sure that the tour is bringing in more than it’s shelling out. After all, my salary is being paid out of the mon­ey that the tour is generating. Man­agement’s job is to run the tour effi­ciently, and cut excess spending every­where they can.

All of that’s okay, but here’s where I get fired up… Sometimes, the tour goes extremely well, like an oiled machine. It’s also generating large sums of money. Wouldn’t you think that as prof­its go up, accommodations would get better, and everyone would get more pay, too?

Unfortunately, this doesn’t happen all of the time. Often, when a tour begins to pull in a lot of dough, the artist and management may want even more corners cut. To avoid what I term “diminishing returns” as one helps the artist to make an even greater profit while perhaps accepting something less than spectacular for yourself, think about negotiating for what will become a bet­ter deal down the road, when and if rev­enues permit. Otherwise, relatively speaking, a salary can become less than what it was when one started.

I share some personal Rock ‘n Roll tour experiences here.

3-2-1-Contact! In this step you will be casting a very wide net and marketing yourself to numerous artists and bands.  Warning.  Do not proceed with this step if you misrepresent yourself, can’t follow through on a musical promise, or if you believe you will fold in high-pressure situations.  You can always proceed at a later date.

Many music business resources appear in the form of lists.  Like phone books for the music industry. Generally, these publications list the managers and office personnel of bands, producers, and recording engineers.  There are also staff directories for record companies.  These lists bring the music industry within your reach.  For our purposes, the Artist Management roster will be the most useful.  This book is designed for people looking to do business with bands and artists (such as yourself).  It lists the direct contact information for virtually every band in the western world, as well as the names and direct numbers for managerial staff.  With this book in hand, your first goal is to choose the bands with whom you want to play.  Then let them know who you are, and how to reach you.  Great!  Start dialing, right?  Not so fast.

You’re going to look at this list and highlight the names of bands with whom you’d like to work. Differentiate by using colored highlighters.  In the past, I used color codes for my personal A, B and C list artists.  I’d start my solicitations with the C list first, allowing me to fall flat on my face with the low stakes clients first.  Over a period of time, I would systematically work my way up to the A list. There is only one chance to make a first impression, so it’s important to sharpen the saw in this manner.

Your next step is to find out the name of the person who handles your targeted band. Although staff names are listed, it is not always apparent which person at the firm handles the artist in question, especially when a firm handles many bands.  So you need to call the management firm directly and ask for the information.  When you call, identify yourself, and express your interest in becoming known to “Band X.”  Then ask for the name of the person who manages that band.  Having a short, concise, and scripted sentence or two is helpful in these situations.   A successful phone call will yield the name of the manager.   You now have a direct contact.

Start writing. Next, craft a brief introductory letter highlighting your features and benefits.  Reference the artist’s work and explain how your drumming is perfect for the artist’s future endeavors.  Direct the reader to your website, where they can learn more about you and your work.  When you are done with the first draft of your letter, proofread and edit it.  This may require several revisions.  Be patient.  When you are ready to send it, choose a mode that suits you (I prefer fax or email).  After it’s been sent, move on to the next contact.  Continue working through your C, B and A lists.  This phase does not require awkward and annoying follow-up calls and emails.  Don’t do it.  Although you are selling your services, the music business does not buy on impulse and you are not selling insurance policies.  However, in a couple of months, you may want to send a business postcard to the recipient.  At a later date, you can also do a general mailing to all names on the firm’s list to cover all bases.

Be realistic. During and after your campaign, be realistic and do not expect callbacks.  When calls come in, you must decide how to field them and sell yourself.  If they do not come, remember that your goal is to become known to the industry and to create top of mind awareness.  This process could produce tremendous results when combined with effective marketing and networking strategies.